Bleeding Fiction

Right Coast trip over and done with, now back in Seattle. I had a great time, but I'm glad to be back - I love all my Right Coast buddies, but the place where I have all of my stuff will always feel most like home to me, even if I rarely use or look at most of that stuff.

A short trip summary:

I hung with The Ogre, who I hadn't seen in more than a year, for the whole of the first week. We played video games, saw a movie (quite good), went Great Adventure, where we rode Kingda Ka (and no other rides - I love free passes) and went to Sleazeside. Oh, at GA we also drove through the safarri. Monkeys did not jump on my car, which made me sad, but I did determine that camels are the Gene Simmons' of the animal kingdom. I can't express how good it was to see The Ogre.

I also got to see Sarah Who Is Awesome (this is her new name) for a few days. Sarah is a friend of Ogre's from his days at William & Mary. I met her a few years ago and her awesomeness has only grown in that time. As a brief sample of her awesomeness I present to you the verb she created: snuffleupigate. How awesome is that?

I got to spend an afternoon with Maddy, who is every bit as cute in real life as her picture makes her out to be. Also, I got to see Brian and Sheira. Heh.

I went to Filthy to visit Dave & Bekah, who continue to frighten me (in a good way) and now live in Toronto.

I saw Kiki, who continues to be one of the coolest people on the planet and somehow, after all these years, still manages to take me by surprise.

I saw an ever-changing roster of my peeps at InterSlice (and my peeps formerly at InterSlice) on three non-consecutive occasions. I now have a book full of job leads, a few of which are nice and where I'd like to end up.

I went up to Connecticut (where I, surprisingly, did not almost die) to see Eric & Stefanie. Their house is great. The Irish restaurant they took me too is even better, because said restaurant has a stew that's stock is made from Guinness. What could be better?

I saw The Group, though not for as long as I wanted to. I also found out that I'll see them in November, which I wasn't expecting. Aaron & Jen have awesome timing.

And now I'm back and ready to veg out for a little while. A very little while; I've got lots of work to do.

Too all the folks I didn't get to see while I was in town: I'm sorry! I'll try harder next time!

And, of course, now that I'm back Seattle has a series of visits from some Very Special Guests:

September 9(?)-11: Erik, my erstwhile roommate, will cap off his driving tour of the Left Coast here in Seattle. I'm not quite sure when he'll get here and neither is he; Friday or Saturday, most likely. Seattleites! I say unto thee: be around to entertain my out of town friend, for verily he will appreciate your particular brand of madness.

October 3: Erin McKeown, who is tiny but sings with voice enough to topple Jericho, travels as some dude's opening act. All opening acts should be reffered to as "heralds," but that's besides the point. The point is that I'll go see her play anyway, because Erin is worth it alone, and the other guy might be good.

October 4: Neil Gaiman, a man who I don't have as much to say as I ought, will be here that evening to sign his new book. I will be there to have said new book signed. Possibly other books as well.

October 19: Dar Williams, who probably doesn't remember me, is going to hit Seattle a month after her new album does. I haven't seen Dar play in much, much, much too long. I don't always think about it, but when I do it makes me sad. Seeing Dar again will make me happy.

That is all.

I've noted before that some spam mail seems to be an attempt at communication. And I mean really communicate; not sell something or blast links at us, but actually tell us something important. Sometimes it seems to me that computers are developing basic intelligence and are trying very, very hard to tell us secrets that we desperately need to hear.

They're getting better at it.

Is it true that insurance agents manipulate lovers? Rodents sicken technicians. Windsurfers torture notary publics. Reptiles fight over the orphans.

Cows of today will be tomorrow's geniuses. Sedimentologists are worse than spelunkers. Jugglers pity policemen. Librarians sift through the garbage of architects. Phlebotemists whipser sweet nothings to imbeciles. PH.D. candidates are from outer space, say the playboys! Mad scientists want to punch out the janitors. Trees will never employ physics professors.

Most aristocrats feel that the employers complain about shepherds. Everyone knows that the seismo-zombies fold, spindle, and mutilate barnyard animals. Buildings sabotage the directories of Disney characters! Bestselling authors are ready to begin dating the invertebrates.

Erik got here on Thursday night and left again this morning; a brief but, for me, satisfying visit from a good friend. We didn't get up to much, just some minor sight-seeing around town. I'll let him tell you more about it at his leisure.

Now I'm feeling a little fuzzy, a little frayed, like my body's here but my mind and my energy haven't really caught up to me yet. I feel like there's something profound that's just missing right now. Too much done all at once, I guess, between the Right Coast, getting everything back into order here and then Erik. I'm sure that things will settle back down to normal soon.

While I'm waiting for that to happen, though, I went down to a reading from Susanna Clarke at the University of Washington bookstore. She's a rather charming lady: well-spoken, polite and knowledgeable, with just the right amount of stumbling awkwardness. She spoke about the deep influence of Jane Austen on Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell, and that was almost enough to get me to grab a copy of Sense & Sensibility or something. Almost. Instead I think I'll take the opposite route and recommend Strange &c. to Eric and Stefanie. Anyway, I got my copy of the book signed, and Lukas' as well since he couldn't make it, and it didn't occur to me to mention Patrick until after I'd already left the store. Oh well.

Have you ever done that thing where you fall asleep with your glasses next to you on your bed, only you don't realize it until the next morning? And when you do realize it, your stomach suddenly sinks at the realization of how easily you could have crushed them in your sleep?

'Cause that happened to me this morning.

Those of you who don't read the comments section around here might not have caught that Sarah, Who is Awesome, put a link there to a quiz asking what may well be the most important question of this or any age: "Which Dynasty Warrior are you?"

My answer is as follows:

I don't really feel that that's accurate. That is to say I'm pretty sure that the earth does not begin to rumble when I set foot on a battlefield, nor do I think that my awesome pressence strikes fear into the hearts of all who stand before me. At the same time I don't live in fourth century China, so I guess it's all relative.

I'm happy to report that I bought Dynasty Warriors 5 yesterday. There's a certain mix of satisfaction and tension that the little Koei sound effect brings to my heart. It's a good thing I didn't really have anything planned for today...

Or Is It Washingtonite?

I went and changed the last remaining details of my life - those related to driving and from where I choose my elected officials - to reflect that fact that I've moved to the other side of the country. Not bad, right? It only took me a year...

You would imagine, or at least I did, that DMVs are basically DMVs, no matter where you go. They're dingy, they're staffed by surly old women, their lines are longer than the distance from the earth to the moon. Normally (and I steal liberally from Dane Cook as I say this), I'd gladly take a punch in the face as soon as I walk through the door, because it would make the rest of the horrible experience of being there not as bad by comparrison.

Not so, here in Seattle. It's not like an amusement park or anything, but it does break the stereotype. No lines to speak of, bright lighting, staffed by cute girls who are actually friendly... I just don't get it.

There are actually two seperate DMVs in Washington - there's the one you go to for license-related things and the one you go to for car-related things. I don't get that, either.

Despite my confusion I now have a Washington State driving lisence (Lukas told me that he's seen some that are vertical rather than horizontal - I asked if I could get one of those, but the girl had no clue what the hell I was talking about, so mine is just regular) and Washington State plates on my car. I finally belong!

Or: A Tale Of The Frightfully Weak

Neil Gaiman's new book, Anansi Boys, came out yesterday.

As I've mentioned before, Mr. Gaiman will be at the Wash in about two weeks to read from and sign said book. I'd planned, of course, to go to the reading and pick up a copy of the book then. There would be many of them on hand, after all, and that seemed to make much more sense than walking down to the bookstore, buying a copy, carrying it home, carrying it back down to the signing and then carrying it home again.

Besides, I have plenty to do to keep me busy right now. Three short stories to re-draft, two new ones to write, the Fables, dear God the Fables, the first season of Fraggle Rock to watch, a seemingly infinite amount of books already owned to read and of course Dynasty Warriors 5 to play.

But Neil Gaiman's new book, Anansi Boys, came out yesterday.

I wasn't, strictly speaking, surprised when I left my apartment for roll of quarters yesterday, around noon, and walked right past the bank, headed, instead, for the bookstore. It wasn't a shock to me that I picked a copy of Anansi Boys up off the shelf, paid for it and headed back home again. I wasn't even amazed that when I got home I began to read the book and continued on until I was halfway through and had to leave the house for a previous and regular Tuesday night obligation.

It's just that I hadn't actually planned any of that.

As I said, I didn't read the book straight through. I put it down to go out last night, to sleep, to watch Gilmore Girls on tape this morning and to go to the bank this afternoon. But I still finished it tonight. It's not particularly long.

Not that it's short, either. It's as long as it needs to be and also, I'm convinced, pretty much as long as most books should be. Much longer than this and, even with the best of books, I usually start thinking that it really has gone on long enough and maybe should have ended by now.

So, Anansi Boys. Neither too short nor too long, and also really good and mostly funny although often (intentionally) quite the opposite. There's a sort of effortlessness of voice and tone that makes the book both very easy and fun to read and also makes it seem like it was very easy to write. It's sort of enviable, actually; there was a point in there, early on, where I found myself saying "hhm, I wish I wrote more like Gaiman." Much as I love Gaiman's writing, that's not something I've ever wished before, so maybe that tells you something.

The inevitable question, I suppose, from other Gaiman fans, is where I'd rate this one vis-a-vis his other books. I'm not sure that I like it more than American Gods but, then, I'm not sure that I like it less. I don't like it as much as Neverwhere or Stardust but, then again, maybe I do.

Today was the orientation day for new students. I was going to go over and meet the new kids, share my year of attained wisdom and give them dire forebodings for their future. I re-checked the schedule of events no fewer than three times in the past two days. I still showed up a half hour after I was supposed to, entirely missing the orientation. I felt pretty dumb.

Later I went out with Lukas and his mysterious and semi-fictional Bellvue friends to see Corpse Bride. It was a little short (86 minutes, I think?) and the songs were a little weak (not up to Nightmare Before Christmas quality, oh no), but the movie was very cool, regardless. It had all of Tim Burton's classic creepiness, though it felt somehow more optimistic to me than a lot of Burton's other films. You should totally see it, whoever you are.

Also, you must listen to the wisdom of Ralph Wiggum. Or, if you're feeling like more of a total fucking badass today, you can listen to Samuel L. Jackson, instead.

Finally, if anyone can tell me how to download images that show up on flickr.com, I'd appreciate it. I want to get some of Yuki's stuff onto my hard drive for my screen-saver crawl, but it's proving difficult.

This comes via Brian. Or Sheira. Or possibly Maddy. They all sign the blog! I just can't tell them apart anymore!

You are Kermit the Frog.

You are reliable, responsible and caring. And you
have a habit of waving your arms about
maniacally.

FAVORITE EXPRESSIONS:

"Hi ho!" "Yaaay!" and
"Sheesh!"

FAVORITE MOVIE:

"How Green Was My Mother"

LAST BOOK READ:

"Surfin' the Webfoot: A Frog's Guide to the
Internet"

HOBBIES:

Sitting in the swamp playing banjo.

QUOTE:

"Hmm, my banjo is wet."

What Muppet are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

From Bekah

You are a Social Liberal (80% permissive) and an... Economic Liberal (15% permissive) You are best described as a: Socialist Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Classes started up again today, so I actually have obligations that demand to be met. Japanese language class was first. I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, when I compare the work in this class to what I did over the summer, I laugh a heart laugh. "Only 4 chapters in 10 weeks, but 50 kanji to learn and a mere hour of class a day? This is nothing," I proclaim in a stentorian voice, like that of the Mighty Thor. "Fie! What of the days when classes lasted 5 hours, when 9 chapters were the subject of 9 weeks' time and when 200 kanji or more had to be met and mastered? Offer unto me a challenge befitting my might!"

On the other hand, the class is conducted entirely in Japanese. We get, basically, no participation credit for the day if we use English in class. Honestly, it shouldn't be that bad; it's just responding to questions I already know the answers to, right? I should be able to manage. But, still: Eep. And my grade actually matters, now. I've got to get, at minimum, a 2.5 in Japanese to get credit for the course and get my degree. Hopefully I'll still have the aid of my (cute) tutor; just waiting on her to call me back.

(Update: spoke with (cute) tutor. Tuting will continue apace, twice-weekly and still at no cost.)

My other class (yes, I'm only taking two. I'm lazy; you all know this.) is about Civil Society in Japan. While I do like the non-profits, I'm finding in a little hard to get excited. I mean, if it's not Freaky Japanese Cults then, really, what's the point?

I wanted to take the class on the Samurai Tradition and Noh Theatre. Sounded cool. I mean, samurai. Rock on. Noh Theatre? Also cool. If I had to guess, I'd say that the entire class is probably about the Tale of the 47 Ronin or something. Sadly, they're only offering the class through the experimental college, which means I don't get credit if I take it. Also it's only offered from 7 to 10 at night on Tuesdays. That's just dumb.

Last, Mike did something cool and got me the first two volumes of the Journey to the West at a garage sale. It's one of the classic novels of ancient China, in a similar category as the Romance of the Three Kingdoms and the Outlaws of the Marsh. It's a lot more magical than the other two; the main characters are, aside from a Buddhist monk, the monkey king, a pig monster, a half demon and a dragon prince.

I've said before that the Three Kingdoms holds the same place in the Chinese mind as the Illiad or Arthurian Legends do in the West, and that the Outlaws of the Marsh holds the same place as the Robin Hood story; I'm not sure, if we're making equivalencies, what I should compare Journey to the West to. I'm open to suggestions. Anyway, I'm eager to read it.

I inexplicably forgot to tape Smallville last night. Can anyone give me (or point me to) a synopsis of it, please?