Someone please explain to me how it's possible for me to stand in front of 200 people for 2 hours and give a speech in English and not feel the least bit put out, to feel, in fact, calm, in control, witty and engaging, and yet stand in front of 20 people for 2 minutes and give a speech in Japanese and be shaking like a leaf.
I knew the material, too. I knew it cold.
So, so frustrating.
Comments (9)
Easy. In tactical situation A, you stand before the crowd with an army at your back. Legions of words, some possessing clear technical superiority over those of your foes, stand ready to march on your command. Ornate symbolisms whip like banners in the wind. And off to the side a full battalion of metaphors prepare a flanking maneuver. You are prepared for any contingency, and the God of Fluency is on your side.
In tactical situation B, you are sent into unfamiliar enemy territory with an inexperienced rookie squad with experimental weaponry. You know how to use the equipment, but not how it works or how to fix it if it breaks. Your map is smudged and you must maintain strict radio silence.
And maybe there's an evil monkey or a stoat or something, and HE speaks PERFECT Japanese.
Posted by Erik | October 12, 2005 1:48 PM
Posted on October 12, 2005 13:48
Gets rolled over by erics legion You know I was gonna put it somthing like that using the much more crass terms expected of me but scince he did such a good job ... never mind
Posted by Zach | October 12, 2005 2:32 PM
Posted on October 12, 2005 14:32
Because a stoat -would- speak Japanese.
Posted by Bekah | October 12, 2005 2:56 PM
Posted on October 12, 2005 14:56
Erik, that is absolutely brilliant. I'm inspired to attack more people with English now (instead of with math and pointy sticks).
I think that I ended up having to work with a Japanese-speaking stoat on an experiment once...
Posted by Sarah | October 12, 2005 3:25 PM
Posted on October 12, 2005 15:25
So what you're saying, Erik, is that I need to give myself a Patton or Churchill-like speech before the next time I have to do this?
But, yeah, you're probably right. It's just so aggrivating. I need to spend like a year in Japan or something...
Posted by Jason | October 12, 2005 11:25 PM
Posted on October 12, 2005 23:25
I think that I ended up having to work with a Japanese-speaking stoat on an experiment once...
That's terrifying.
Of course, combining math with English warfare enables you to launch a synesthesia cannonade. That is also the name of a band I just made up.
Posted by Erik | October 13, 2005 7:15 AM
Posted on October 13, 2005 07:15
I bow to Eriks grammatical command.
and actually happy that the worst I have to deal with is strange English accents form people in India and Brazil
Posted by gus | October 13, 2005 8:14 AM
Posted on October 13, 2005 08:14
I think that I ended up having to work with a Japanese-speaking stoat on an experiment once...
How could you keep this from me?!
Posted by Bekah | October 14, 2005 12:31 PM
Posted on October 14, 2005 12:31
Because you've never met Sarah (Who Is Awesome) before?
Posted by Jason | October 15, 2005 1:24 PM
Posted on October 15, 2005 13:24