I don't believe in Karma. At least, I don't believe in the sort of Hindu, Westernized version of the word, where being, say, a raper-of-puppies in a past life will come back to haunt you in this one, by you being reincarnated as a dog or something. In other words, while I believe that my actions have consequences, I don't much believe in principles of cosmic vengeance. But, sometimes, that leads me to the conclusion that the universe at large just delights in seeing me suffer.
Here's a story:
A guy meets a girl. The girl's witty, she's cute and the guy thinks, "what the hell? Why not?" and he asks her out. They're both nervous, but the date goes well; every topic that comes up, they've got plenty in common, but enough that's different to learn about, to talk. Repeat the process the next day, and on into the next morning and the one after that. Things are going amazingly well, surprisingly quickly. The guy and the girl are both very happy.
At which point one of the girl's friends, sparked to action by the girl's constantly talking about how wonderful the guy is, declares his undying love for her. The girl bites her lip; she doesn't know what to do. Because she's kind, because she's honest, because things are going well, she tells the guy. The guy wants to explode, but he doesn't want to lose the girl. So he talks to her about it; tells her its her decision, but that he would prefer she stuck with him. He resolves to keep showing her a good time, to keep her thinking about why things went so well with them to begin with.
It doesn't work. A little bit later, the girl turns to the guy and says "so," and that's pretty much the end of it. The guy says a few things, but mostly he just leaves; after all, you can't rationalize someone into loving you.
The End
I can deal with casual cruelty. I'm not bothered by the existence of sharks or bad things happening to good people or what-have-you. It's just that, sometimes, the things that happen to me are a little hard to believe, a little too complex, a little too pre-scripted. I meet a girl and things are going amazingly well? Well, of course she has a friend who's been carrying a torch for her. I'm trapped in a work of fiction, and the writer has it in for me.
Comments (25)
Fuck. I'll crack open the vodka and call you in a bit.
Posted by The Ogre | November 14, 2005 1:57 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 13:57
The problem with other people is that they often refuse to follow the script, no matter how well-written.
Posted by Erik | November 14, 2005 2:10 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 14:10
Not that I drink it but I'll bring the Guinness and a bottle of Meade (now that I'll drink).
Posted by Brian | November 14, 2005 2:11 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 14:11
I am really sorry, Jason. That truly sucks. I wish that I could be out there so we could drink that sparkling Shiraz and play Horsey Game as we talked about it all.
I'm sorry. :(
Posted by Sarah | November 14, 2005 3:27 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 15:27
I'm so sorry that you have to go through this. You and all of us here know how truly special you are. One day you will meet the right girl that will see what all of us see and she will realize how lucky she is to have a great guy like you.
No sense in letting a good drinking moment go to waste though. Martini anyone?
Posted by Kiki | November 14, 2005 5:19 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 17:19
Hmmm... That sucks... but if it was not meant to be... it was not meant to be... perhaps you can find the nerd girl with the glasses and when you take them off... she can be that stunning beauty you desire... no wait... wrong generation of movies and that was like 3 posts ago...
Posted by Mike | November 14, 2005 7:35 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 19:35
Oh man.
Posted by Aaron | November 14, 2005 8:10 PM
Posted on November 14, 2005 20:10
Bummer.
I feel like that a lot. But look at it this way, at least you don't have to shell out hundreds of dollars when the universe laughs at you.
Posted by Bekah | November 15, 2005 5:28 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 05:28
Dude, that sucks.
Does this still fit into your 80's movie mold, or have we moved into 90's angst?
Posted by Eric | November 15, 2005 6:09 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 06:09
Sorry to hear it.
However, in your story you state: "Repeat the process the next day, and on into the next morning..." Does this mean you at least bagged her?
Posted by Rich | November 15, 2005 9:29 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 09:29
Always classy, Rich.
Posted by The Ogre | November 15, 2005 10:27 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 10:27
That sucks. But remember, this is why God invented tire-slashing...
Posted by Lukas | November 15, 2005 10:41 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 10:41
Hmmm....
The girl's 19, right? She's too young to realize that her friend is completely pulling the wool over her eyes. Said friend just can't stand the thought of being alone. He doesn't actually like her.
Still sucks for you though. I second the tire-slashing.
Failing that, keep in touch with the girl. That way, when the "friend" screws up in about 3 weeks, you can pick up the pieces if you're so inclined.
Posted by Marc | November 15, 2005 11:00 AM
Posted on November 15, 2005 11:00
Then comes the bagging....
Thanks Ogre.
Posted by Rich | November 15, 2005 1:01 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 13:01
Any time, Rich. Oh yeah, watch your back. ;)
Posted by The Ogre | November 15, 2005 2:06 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 14:06
Right-o
Posted by Rich | November 15, 2005 2:11 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 14:11
Rich - Sadly, no, I didn't.
Thanks, everyone, for your sympathy and suggestions. Tire slashing is pretty much out (girl doesn't have a car), but I assure you I didn't let a good opportunity to drink go to waste (and special thanks for that to The Ogre; it's not drinking alone if you're on the phone with someone, right?).
Anyway, keeping in touch isn't going to happen. I've got no bad blood towards her, but I've got a thing for the girl, and that just wouldn't make a friendship a good idea.
Time to do that thing where I move on, instead. Send women!
Posted by Jason | November 15, 2005 3:22 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 15:22
ah well...on to the next woman! With how hot you look (according to that last photo) you should have no trouble finding a better and more mature non-running-to-stupid-guy-friend woman who will treat you right. man.
Posted by Deb | November 15, 2005 5:17 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 17:17
Dude.
You should have exploded.
As in "The guy wants to explode, but ..."
As in how much you care for her, how great this is, all that. Unless that caring wasn't really true, in which case it's better off over.
Posted by eef | November 15, 2005 10:34 PM
Posted on November 15, 2005 22:34
Wow. Turn my back for a few seconds.
Sorry how things turned out. Wish there was something I could say, but then again, I think I said it already, months ago, so at the very least, you can just refer back to our previous conversations.
You should call next Monday night when I'm not working. Hint hint.
Posted by Jon | November 16, 2005 11:36 AM
Posted on November 16, 2005 11:36
I appreciate the thought, Ed, and though others have told me the same thing, I've never yet met a girl who reacted well to me losing my cool in a situation like this. I've been trained off of it, as it were, by experience. I told her I was jealous instead and she thanked me for keeping my cool. Maybe not what others' experience called for, maybe not what this particular girl wanted me to do but, like I said, my own experience has taught me that getting hyper-jealous doesn't go over well.
Jon - I'll be on the Right Coast on Monday, and thereby may find myself out and about, but I'll try my best to give you a ring.
Posted by Jason | November 16, 2005 3:23 PM
Posted on November 16, 2005 15:23
I'm confused; your own experiences tell you not to "explode," but wasn't your whole intro about how these "pre-scripted" things just repeat and repeat. Time to screw with the script.
But first, drinking! See you Sunday.
Posted by Adi | November 16, 2005 6:34 PM
Posted on November 16, 2005 18:34
We just can't win, can we?
Posted by eef | November 16, 2005 7:14 PM
Posted on November 16, 2005 19:14
Not me, Ed. I totally can't win. You're married; you won at least a little. (Unless that counts as a loss, but if so, you're probably better off not mentioning it in public.)
Adi - Think, man! Think! In the past: explosions! At present: make a change and no explosions! But, as Ed said, I pretty much can't win either way.
Which doesn't mean I'm going to stop playing.
See you Sunday!
Posted by Jason | November 17, 2005 12:17 AM
Posted on November 17, 2005 00:17
Sorry to hear this recent turn of events one thing is certain all is fair in love if you really have an interest in this girl don't go out without a fight.
After all all good things are worth fighting for.
Posted by gus | November 25, 2005 3:05 PM
Posted on November 25, 2005 15:05